I'm pretty bad ass at my school, but I can be badass anywhere...
Malcolm is graduating from his preschool today, and I am very excited. Well, since he isn’t going to kindergarten next year, he really isn’t graduating so much as just moving on to a different school next fall. His school is calling it a graduation, however, and I for one am jumping on the bandwagon. We have invited his grandparents to the event at the school and I am sufficiently motivated to mark the occasion that I am making ribs for the potluck following the ceremony. Mmm ribs. You know I am geeked up over something when I break out the pork.
Curious to see what he thinks about the milestone, I have been talking to him about what this means and asking him how it makes him feel. His response up ’til now has been nonchalance to the point where I am seriously irritated. I am not sure if he doesn’t get the fact that he is losing his primary source of education for the last two years (my function has now been limited to chauffeur, cook and batting practice pitcher), doesn’t want to think about it, or just honestly doesn’t give a fuck, but he will not show any sort of emotion over this rather large change to his schedule. “Hey Malcolm, after June 17, you’re not going to be going to your school anymore. Will you be sad?” His answer, “No.” I asked him what he would miss most about his preschool, and he said, “Nothing.” I even tried to point out that he wasn’t ever going to see most of his friends ever again (in a blatant attempt to go Barbara Walters on his ass and make him cry,) but he quickly pointed out that he’ll make new friends at his new school. WHY ARE YOU SUCH A ROBOT ABOUT THIS? Can’t you even show the slightest bit of emotion?! Damn your indifference!!!
Mind you, this is the kid that shows emotion every day over being told to stop watching Giants’ highlights and eat breakfast. He told me he hated my guts when I took a plastic golf ball away from him yesterday because he kept hitting it at the TV. He will absolutely melt down if I have the temerity to suggest that we race to see who can get their seat belt on first. I asked him to stay on his step stool while he brushed his teeth the other day, and he reacted with enough ferocity to suggest that I had just stepped on his nuts. Oh, but leaving your teachers and most of your friends behind to go to a brand new school where he doesn’t know anyone? Hardly a second thought.
Maybe I am getting worked up over nothing, as I would feel pretty bad if he was truly saddened by the fact that his time at this school was ending. I guess I just want him to realize that he should cherish the things in life that he likes, because they may not last forever. My only hope is that when he sees that I have made ribs tonight, he’ll finally realize that he is passing a significant milestone and react accordingly. Then again, he may just tell me that he hates me…
Tags: tantrums
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Why are you poking the hive, you moron?
If he’s going to be an emotionless blob of pre-K mashed potatoes about leaving school forever then let him be. Didn’t you learn anything from Pearl Harbor? Unless you truly WANT your ass handed to you, don’t wake the sleeping elephant.
You parents of only children– too much time on your hands.
I would actually like to have my ass handed to me. Not quite sure about the physics, but like we tell Malcolm, “You gotta try everything once!”