From Caveman To This?

Posted by Big Daddy Paul in Cooking and Eating

DSC_0253What a long strange trip it has been for us guys.  During our neanderthal days, we killed animals on the hunt and took neanderthalettes to keep the cave tidy and raise our young.   After some time, we invented church so that we could marry our ladies and then invented new churches so we could divorce them. Then, we invented bread so that we could say that we brought something home every day (even though we had no idea what to do with it when we actually got there.) Things pretty much stalled out there until World War II, where we went out and slaughtered one another, leaving our ladies to go out and work in the factories for a living. Forced to deal with the fact that women wanted to work, we have become more involved in the raising of the children, so much so that some of us have evolved to the point where we are the ones raising the little neanderthals (we may have left the cave, but kids are the same dirty, stinky animals that were raised back in the day.)

This progression was not lost on me this week, as we prepared to host Amy’s book club at our house.  We have evolved to the point where working women now gather and are fed by men who keep the home.  We get this honor once a year, when we host some of the movers and shakers in the HR software industry as they get together to swill good wine, eat tasty food, and trash or love whatever the book selection is that month.  These women are intelligent, successful and know the difference between gourmet and canned chili (damn them!).

I was told to offered to make the spread for the event, and then got really bummed to learn that the book was set in India.  Typically, there is a connection between the location of the book and the cuisine served for these book clubs, so I had just signed up for cooking Indian food (which I know absolutely nothing about) for 8-12 foodies.  Oops!  I began to stress.

I eventually came up with a couple of dishes to serve,and tried them out for Amy the night before book club.  The food tasted somewhere between food available at an Indian restaurant and food rotting in an Indian restaurant’s garbage dumpster.  I got even more stressed.  I busted my hump and the event came and went without anyone telling me I needed to go back to work as a lawyer, so that was nice.  A few people were even gracious enough to tell me that they enjoyed eating it, although I am sure the wine had more to do with that than my culinary skills.

As I laid exhausted on the couch afterwords, I thought about how silly the caveman would think I am.  “You a turd,” he would say (cavemen grammar is awful.)  “Women cook, men work.”  I could give him a lesson in how we are better off in a world of gender equity, how much fun it is to be a stay at home parent, or even the feeling of satisfaction one gets in providing a meal that others claim to enjoy.  Or, I could make fun of his back hair.  Either way, we’ve come a long way, and that’s just fine with me.

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5 responses to “From Caveman To This?”

  1. Marcie says:

    You don’t give yourself enough credit. It was great. Best part was the tapioca soup.

  2. this is awesome and hilarious. and having enjoyed one of your book club feasts in the past, I don’t believe a word about the rotting garbage thing!

  3. Lisa says:

    Hey caveman – I’ll eat your tikka masala any day!

  4. Thanks for the props, I’m glad that you all aren’t nearly as discerning as I gave you credit for!

  5. Sherri Bartels says:

    Me like your food. Ugg!

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